It galls me that Captain America: The First Avenger is not going to be voted the best Marvel movie in this completely arbitrary, fan-based, no-sports-right-now-so-let’s-ask-people-to-vote-on-this bracket done by SB Nation. I have been thinking about this all day. I have a nine-month-old daughter, and thinking about her (if we’re being honest) has been a distant second to thinking about the traveshamockery of the voters, and the bracket.
First things first, let’s get this out of the way: I think Captain America: The First Avenger is not only the greatest Marvel movie, but one of the best movies of all time. I can watch it over and over and over again. In fact, I have watched it over and over and over again. I will watch it over and over and over again, again. The story is great. The acting is great. The cast is incredible. Ignoring Chris Evans and Hayley Atwell and Sebastian Stan, you have Dominic Cooper, Tommy Lee Jones with his dry humor, Hugo Weaving as the bad guy, STANLEY TUCCI. And to top it off? The movie does not have a Hollywood, normal Super Hero ending. It’s a really sad ending. The first time I showed it to my mom, her first comment was “that was such a sad ending!”
So ok that’s taken care of. Now let’s look at the bracket SB Nation put together. All three Captain Americas in the same bracket? Dr. Strange (a great movie) against Captain America First Avenger (a great movie) in the first round? A possible matchup between Guardians of the Galaxy movies in the second round? Nope. So I went ahead and fixed it.
Captain America is the ACC; classic, historical, and all three movies make it to the quarterfinals, with two in the final four.
Iron Man is the Pac 12; yes, all three movies are in the bracket, but let’s be honest, there’s really only one that is good, and even that one isn’t quite as good as some of the other movies.
The Avengers movies are the Big Ten; great, but unfortunately, other movies are greater.
Thor is the Big 12; only one movie makes it past its opening matchup but then goes all the way to the finals.
Ant-Man is not a conference but a team: Gonzaga. While it can hold its own against the other, bigger movies, it can’t quite match their firepower.
Spider Man is the SEC; maybe not considered a powerhouse when compared to the rest of the Marvel movie universe but still fun and successful.
My bracket also includes upsets (End Game becomes the first top seed to fall, losing to eventual champion First Avenger, with Infinity War the next top seed to exit, falling to Guardians of the Galaxy in a nailbiter). Thor: Ragnarok defeats Dr. Strange, which is funny (to me), because Dr. Strange appears in Thor: Ragnarok and Thor appears in Dr. Strange. Civil War (which, let’s be honest, is basically another Avengers movie, probably would have made the finals if it were on the opposite side of the bracket but it still would have lost (barely) to First Avenger.
I know the SB Nation final bracket is going to look very different from the one I put together, but I can say with all confidence that their bracket will be wrong. You should only refer to mine as the real one. Captain’s orders.